I think time has officially come to a screeching halt.  Without school to occupy my time, I feel as though every second is taking forever to tick away.  I'm actually finding myself ready to go back to school, but it doesn't even begin for another month.

FFXI is going well.  I've been Lv.75 for a while now, and I got access to several new areas.  The Tavnazian zones are very neat, as is the Aht Urhgan region.  However, Sky has become my new favorite place.  Ru'Aun Gardens is one of the most beautiful places I've seen in the game, and it is all very mysterious.  It's only another week or two before they add personal chocobos to the game.  It will be nice to finally have a mount, and not have to rely on chocobo stables for transportation.

I unlocked the Corsair job, and with the release of Pirates of the Carribean, I've taken new interest in being a pirate/gambler in FFXI.  I really like the job so far, but it is taking some getting used to.  I am not accustomed to playing melee jobs, but I think I am adapting. 

I have hit an explosion of creative energy when it comes to my book.  I have added at least five new plots to the thick of it, and I am beginning to see how the middle of the story will come together.  I hope to have the book up on my website later this year, complete with pictures.  I will then go through the insane task of editing it and looking for a publisher.  Even though I haven't finished the first book yet, I have plots for eight more books in this series.  I am calling the first trilogy "The   I have, in a way, figured out how it's all going to end, but there are so many characters developing through time, I just don't know who will be there to see it. 

Well, I'll update again when I get a chance.

The big 8-0-0

It has been quite a while since my last post.  I've been working too hard and taking far too many classes this year, and I'm happy that school is nearly out.  On an interesting note, this is my 800th day as a Xanga member (that's more than two years!)  I can't believe it's only been 800 days though.  It seems like it has been far longer.  Then again, I'm one of those people who perceives time as passing way too slowly.  For example, Christmas was only four months ago, but, in my own thinking, it feels like twenty years has gone by since the 25th of December.  Strange and definitely not normal, but it's how my mind works.  Someone once told me it was because I am young, and time seems to move slower because a year is only 1/20th of my life, instead of 1/40th or 1/60th, etc. 

Anyway, a bit of an update.

I'm still playing FFXI.  It has been one of the most enjoyable video games I've ever played, and I am happy I discovered it.  I plan on playing it until FFXII and the new Zelda game come out.  Anyway, I've got WHM up to Lv.72 now (Lv.75 is the maximum), and I'm just hanging out now, doing fun missions and helping people out.  I'm nearly to the end of the game, which is where about fifty percent of the game actually begins, and I'm really excited about finally getting to some of the most incredible stuff in the game.  I am working toward unlocking different worlds right now, such as Sky, Lufaise Meadows, and Sea, and I may even try for Moongate access if I can time it right (you can only get access when it is a full moon out).  I also plan on getting access to the Eastern Continent, where the Kingdom of Aht Urhgan is.  I finally saved up enough in-game currency to buy some of the best equipment for WHM, and I am nearly done with my insane, year-long farming spree.  It has taken me about ten months to get from level fifty to level seventy-two, simply because I spent eighty percent of my play time making money.  I'm glad that I did it though, and I feel a great sense of accomplishment that I was able to save up enough to buy most everything good for my job by the time I reached the level that I could wear it. 

My book is going well.  I took a creative writing class this year to help me gain insight and training in how to actually write, edit, and publish a book.  I also was able to get two of my poems published by a respectable literary journal called the "Scribe".  I only have two more years before graduation, and hopefully I'll have my first novel finished by that time.  Heaven help me if I can't do it in two years.

I've done very well in learning languages.  I'm thinking of learning Italian once I'm quite fluent in Spanish, and then maybe Chinese or Japanese. 

Easter is fast approaching, and I got a beautiful new suite to wear on Sunday.  I don't wear suits often, but this one is absolutely gorgeous, and I might just enjoy wearing it. 

Well, that's about it for now.  Nothing truly grand happening.  Take care... if there's anybody who actually reads this.

~Child

He he…

Well, it’s been 556 days (wow, that’s a big number) since joining Xanga.  I still haven’t gone premium with it, but I haven’t really found the need to.  I like the skin I have, I don’t need a lot of space for photos, and I am just really happy with the layout as it is.  I think I like MSN Spaces a little bit better, but Xanga still has a place in my heart.  Faces.com is a very nice site, and it had more people, and faster loading screens, it would be perfect.  I am still using Photobucket.com for all my image hosting needs, and I hope to put some drawings of mine up on this site today.  I only have one scanned in at the moment.  It’s of a guy named Jason Behr (he was in a TV show called Roswell, and also the move “The Grudge”).  It’s not the best in the world, but I like it.

Anyway, here it is.  Be kind.  http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/Max.jpg

Also, I have done quite a few things on Photoshop.  I made a few backgrounds, but mostly, I have worked on special effects.  Here is a link to the special effects pictures: 

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/SphereofSunlight.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/SphereofStar.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/SphereofSparkles.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/SphereofPoison.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/SphereofLightning.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/SphereofLight.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/SphereofFire.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/SphereofEnergy.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/SphereofBirthday.jpg

And here are the couple of backgrounds done on Photoshop:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/Wisp.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/SonginColor.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/PainthatSeparates.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/LightandShadow.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/LamentofBlue.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/GoldenName.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/ColdColors.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/BlackandBlue.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/ChildOfFaith888/AwokenStrength.jpg

Well, that should be more than enough pictures for today.  It took me months and months to make them all, so I probably won't have a whole lot of new ones anytime soon.  Enjoy!

~Joshua Michael

**Edit**

I just noticed that some of the images (the backgrounds mostly) were sized down by Photobucket.  If you like any of the backgrounds, and want the full 1024x768 pixel size, let me know, and I'll send them to you. 

Well, it’s been a VERY long time since I’ve been on this site, but I have decided to rekindle it (and other things in my life that were always enjoyable).

Time to play catch up I guess…

First, I have been in Europe for a very long time and I’m finally home in the good ol’ U S of A (where I have a computer).  Second, I started playing Final Fantasy XI again, and have slowly reached level 54.  I think the last time I wrote on here I had only gotten to 20. Third, Nodeka is just a distant memory, as my computer will no longer work with it.  I don’t know what’s wrong, but something (maybe ad-ware) has been messing with my ability to run java based things.  And lastly, my life is, for the first time in a long time, actually on the right path.  I got over my whole “scrutiny” thing, and decided to just let people live their lives, and help those that I can.  I still go out and people watch from time to time, but it’s no longer for educational purposes, it’s more for entertainment now (drunk people are fun to watch, and sometimes fun to mess with).

I did a lot of reading in Europe.  I finished a whole slew of Dragonlance books, and am almost finished with my fifth John Grisham novel.  I have also continued writing my own book.  I have about 85 pages typed up, but I want it to be pretty long; maybe 400-500 pages.  I really need to focus on it, but I fear that with school and work, I simply won’t have all that much time for my book writing.

I have begun learning Tai Chi, and it’s a lot more fun than it looks.  Much like when I started practicing Yoga, it is frustrating at first, but becomes very relaxing after learning all the moves.  I hope to finish the basics some time this month, and begin intermediate and advanced postures by the end of the year.  

Television shows have become a new obsession for me.  I have been buying DVDs of different TV shows that I like, such as Farscape and Stargate.  However, I have gotten to the point where I have things every night that I watch.  On Monday, I watch the show “24”, on Tuesday, I watch “Gilmore Girls” and “One Tree Hill,” Wednesday, I watch “Lost” and “Alias,” and I tape the shows “Scrubs” and “Smallville,” on Thursday, I watch “Joey,” and on Friday I watch “Enterprise” (which just finished it’s last season).  Saturday night I go out with friends, whilst taping “Mutant X” and “Andromeda” (which also just finished it’s last season).  Sunday is one of my favorite shows, “Boston Legal” which has James Spader and William Shatner.  And that’s my week of TV.

Movies, on the other hand, have gone down hill a little bit.  I haven’t seen a movie in theaters in a very, very long time.  First of all, it’s gotten too expensive to go ($9 for a ticket and another $8 if I want popcorn and a drink).  It has become impossible to go on dates to the movies because I end up spending almost $50 for two tickets, two popcorns and drinks, and candy for the girl.  RIDICULOUS!  So, I have now devoted my movie experiences to rentals.  Blockbuster and Hollywood Video are by far cheaper, and it is much more intimate of a date to watch movies in a living room, in a comfy couch, with a blanket and a mug of hocho.

Well, that’s pretty much my life in the past year.  I’m not going to talk about my Euro-trip, as it is not something I am ready to relive as of yet.  But, maybe one of these days I’ll go into it.

Nine days have passed.  They have passed quickly, but then again, they passed too slow.  I have mixed feelings about my past week and two days, so I guess I'll just start from the beginning.

Life stresses me out sometimes.  It really is a wonderful thing, but I also think that to die would be a great adventure as well.  I am growing weary of all of the 'normal' people in the world.  They have so much anger and malice towards those of us who are different in how we look, or think, or act, or feel.  I know that their beliefs and opinions will eventually stunt their ability to grow and function as individuals, and they will probably get stuck in some social or employment situation that they cannot escape from and do not revel in.  However, right now, in the present world, the 'normal' people have all the luck. 

I sometimes want to be 'normal,' but then I think of how sad and unhappy my life would be.  I would just be some empty shell filled with the idea that external verification is all that matters.  I would be depressed ALL of the time, instead of SOME of the time.  I get down about my life every once in a while, but I don't dwell on it.  I'm not some "used to be the captain of the football team that never moved out of town and always wants to babysit your kids for money (and other things)" kind of person.  I left my hometown.  I made my way through the world.  I made myself who I am today.  I had help of course, and I had some really incredible influences along the way, but I am my own person.  When I walk out of the house, I don't expect anyone to notice me.  I expect to just walk along and be myself.  I don't expect someone to respect me 'cause I wear Prada shoes, or a Gucci hat.  Designer clothes are not all that they're cracked up to be.  It is only an image, only the way you appear.  If I want attention, I'll dress in drag and do the hoola.  I'm not going to parade around in a pair of $300 shoes and expect people to respect my 'status.'

Of course, I'm not going to judge other people who feel that such things are important.  Even if they have the nerve to tell me that I'm delusional and that I live in my own little world, bereft of any form of reality, I'll still not judge them.  Because I know the truth.  I know that it is truly them whom are suffering from a delusional state of mind.  They stress and worry SO much about their image, that they have little time for other things, for the true pleasures in life.  God is the force that rules my life, not other people's opinions.  And I feel so sorry for people that are like that.  I hope that one day, they too will find God. 

Also, I've decided to try to help everybody that I meet.  I have come into contact with so many sad people.  None of them seem to have any hope at all, and many are completely without love.  I loath the fact that so many people grew up with nobody to love in their lives.  My family has ALWAYS been there to love me and keep me safe and warm.  But I was a very blessed child.  I picked a good mommy and daddy to be born to.  Many were not as lucky when they chose their parents.  It is in these people that hope is lost.  God is love, and without ever knowing love, they could never know God.

Also, I've stumbled on something very disturbing.  Many of the people around my age have begun going to bars.  This isn't so disturbing to people of other upbringings, but to me, it is scary.  They go to these bars looking for someone to love, and all that they recieve is empty, meaningless sex.  Most of the time it is with older people too.  Now, I'm not going to tell people how to live their lives, but I will say this to the older people of the world.  I know that it seems to be a gift from heaven to have these young guys and girls, barely legal, who are looking for a hook up.  But think about more than your hormones for a second.  Ask yourself a question before you even think about having sex with someone my age.  Ask yourself, "Why are they at a bar, instead of having fun with friends and family?"  And when you get approached by someone my age, ask that young adult the same question.  Their answers might shock you.

The answers of "I don't have that many friends." and "My family isn't exactly a group of people you'd want to be around." are the most common.  They are looking for someone to love them, to care about them, and to keep them safe and warm.  They think that sex will bring this, but it doesn't.  The feelings are merely temporary, and do not fill the void.  Only Love can truly fill that void, and what they really need is a friend, a brother, a sister, a father, or a mother.  Someone to help them along in life, because their actual friends and family have abandoned them.

I will try my truest to be such a friend to people who have lost their way.  And I urge anyone out there who reads this to do the same.